I'm fighting back tears right now. I'm about to cry. What sparked it? I decided to look at an old friend's blog (her name is Amy C.) and she's progressing. And so am I. Why did the tears begin to roll? I don't quite know. It's quite odd for a man to cry.
Strong emotion. It has caused me to rethink and evaluate myself. This summer I had grown and matured. I had surrendered my life to God. I have gained so much knowledge. And impermeable, unbreakable inner strength, and a mental immunity to ignorance. Knowledge and wisdom are my greatest allies in this fight. I have learned so much. But what I've learned is only a microscopic molecule of a drop in a pond on a planet that is a tiny speck whirling around a giant ball of gas hurdling around a galaxy in a massive Universe. If only I knew more... This summer my life had gained extreme meaning. I am who I am. I often write or create something beautiful that catches someone's eye and have often found myself wondering why it has this affect on others but I realize what it is inside that is doing it. A strength. An energy. A flicker of light that I've captured and held onto. I used to think that I had no emotion. That I was an emotionless core on a journey of self discovery. What I found was that this isn't a journey at all and that the end of my journey is a step away. That I had already discovered myself. That it's not about strength. That's it about grace. That it's not about will. It's about faith. I was foolish to ever think that there wasn't any emotion in me when my heart is exploding with love and compassion. I love you all. All the world a stranger, all hold a special place in my heart. We are all truly equal. I shall not deny knowledge wherever I go, sin being my greatest flaw. I shall embrace it. I shall share it. I shall not let my heart be distracted. I shall keep an attentive, open heart and mind to it and not turn away my ears. Oh so much to say! So many feelings to express! So many different ways to start!
