1:49 AM. That's the time that I'm writing this message. And a few seconds ago I saw that an "Anonymous Caller" called the house from the caller ID. It was Toney, my mother's ex-husband. The divorce isn't quite finalized yet. Tonight we came home from having dinner and going to someone's house and found that the kitchen light was on, and the gates at the side of the house were opened. In the shadows I saw Toney lying down at the side of the house. With the bike. By the Holy Spirit, I noticed. I gave my mum the car keys and I went to open the door. She then repositioned the car so my sister could get in. I called the police. My mum rode around the block. Then she came back and went in the house. Shortly after, the police came. They had flashlights and they asked him to empty his pockets. He has a large lump on his stomach. It's from crack. He was cracked out, intoxicated, and drugged up. We looked, and he broke into my mum's bedroom. His pockets were filled with her rings, probably what he would use to get more crack money, and a dollar she had on her dresser. Then he took the tools from the garage, her change (quarters and nickels), and the mortgage papers. My television was on because I programmed it to turn on at exactly 11:00PM, by the Holy Spirit. He was sitting right outside my bedroom door when the police found him. He could have been hiding in the house waiting to kill us when we got him, because the police found a knife on him, too, but by the Holy Spirit, that didn't happen. The police got him up, and he couldn't even stand because he was so cracked up on cocaine. The police couldn't arrest him. Why? Because satan's given him that. The divorce isn't until months of now, and so we have to suffer in the process. So, he still has rights to the house, to the car, and to everything my mum has. It would be illegal to keep him from the house, even though he's been out of it for 6 months and the thought of him coming back here again terrifies us. So the police just took him home. Two of them came, which is great. Because that means that since he tried to call back here again even when the polic escorted him home, and he called right before he pulled this stunt and came over to harass us, he might try again and stab us to death and we'll have 2 policemen over in a short amount of time if that happens. I'm really trying to protect my family, and God is helping us. We've seen signs, and we look to Him for strength, and have faith. Christ sits on the right hand of God. The right hand of God is the strength of God. We're strong to the end. I can't sit here and fear for my mother and sister's life. But God neither slumbers nor sleeps. And He's watching over us. And so I'm cautious, and worried, but I have faith. He's our help. Please pray for us.
After studying hours of scripture, I realize that God talks to me personally, but that in the major scheme of things, I'm a small integrand of a larger derivative. I'm a small, but important part. God tells you that you're important to Him. If we weren't, He wouldn't have died for us. He loves us a lot, even though we're so small.
But if it's okay, I'd like to share something small... I once lusted in my heart for something, even though Christ was telling me that "He follows Him must be crucified of all that he has, because Christ will give him things greater than what he has out of faith." I told myself that I lusted for them out of love, but I realize now... it wasn't love. Well, it was, but there was lust in it, when there shouldn't have been. So I "had" what I lusted after for years. And then it was time that having that was going to become physical and worldly rather than spiritual and out of faith. And the very morning when that was supposed to happen, God allowed something to happen that was going to happen to hinder that from happening. But if He hadn't allowed it to happen, I wouldn't have seen the glory that I'm still amazed by now. I would have forgotten the Lord in my richness of having what my heart lusted after. But what I didn't realize all along was that God already owned and was raising that which I lusted after having for myself in my heart. And that since I was God's, He would have given them to me. And I was blinded by my heart's own lusts. When I was disadvantaged by the evil that happened to me, I was knocked to my feet. But Christ, after months of teaching me, and showing me great things, opened my eyes, and lifted me up. I once lusted in my heart. Now I love with it rather than lust. Far from having what I once lusted after, I understand now why I couldn't have it. Though God blessed Job's end over his beginning, I'm not even certain that the Lord will give me directly what I used to lust after having. But if He decides that I'm not worthy of having them. Then it would be okay. Because greater are the things to come than the things that appear to be. Pursuing what I used to want would be a vanity. And my Father already has them. And I have Christ. And Christ belongs to the Father. So it'd be a vanity to lust. I already have. Thanks for reading................
You'll very very rarely see it said in any media or by any sort of worker said this way, but "Merry Christmas" to those that receive this message, and all messages that the Lord presents to them. Have a good day~ Isaac D.
I was once a man, born of a woman. Then I was born a second time, born of God, who Fathered my spirit. I write this now as a past testimony, so that no one would say that I'm not who I am, or that I don't speak the truth.
I'm happy. Why? Because Christ, who's blood I am reborn in, said happy are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of God. No matter what my surroundings...I remain poor in spirit. No matter the amount of, in abundant supply or lacking thereof, the spirit that the Father raised in Christ remains poor in spirit.
I say this now, in a time when I am poor, surrounded by what someone would consider to have been poor, so that if that were to ever change, and only by the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, no one would accuse me of being something that I am not because they can only see me from a one-dimensional earthly view, through fleshly eyes. Look at me with the eyes of your spirit, and you will see that I am poor in spirit.
Christ says that they that are rich in this world, being friends under the yoke of the world, are poor, blind, naked, wretched, and miserable.
But they that are Christ's and belong to God, born of God, being friends of Christ and partakers of the same inheritance, are yoked to Christ, the easy, light-hearted yoke, and are made rich. Can see with eyes that weren't used until the second birth. Are made truly alive. Are clothed in the pure, white robs of their righteousness, being called the righteousness of God later. Happy are they, though they are poor in spirit.
We are crucified of the world, and this age, and all of its fleshly apparent treasures so that we might see the hope of glory and reap the reward of the inheritance promised to us that is a thousand times greater than anything the world may offer. In salvation, we gain everything through God who is loving enough to give it. But though we live in this world, we seem and appear to be wretched and miserable, and appear to die. But we are happy, and have the light-heartedness of Christ, and have eternal life.
Christ was arrayed in glory with the Father, then incarnated into the flesh and made poor, so that those that are poor here might be arrayed in the same glory as Christ is today. And this is how we are rich. Through faith. No matter the earthly appearance of vain things such as status, or the worthless worths that the world places on us.
We are the anointed that heard the voice of one crying in the wilderness, and were baptized in the Holy Spirit and in water. The Holy Spirit is the living water within, and Christ is the bread of life. Eating the bread of life, and drinking His blood, we never thirst or hunger. Being spirit, we never tire. We work with our own hands righteous, good works. And we have faith in the hope of Christ, and the reward awaiting us once our work is finished.
Let no man or woman call me rich. But call me poor in spirit. Don't disrespect me by viewing me with fleshly, earthly eyes, but with those of your spirit. And this is my testimony.
Right at this very moment, I hunger. My family suffers. We owe debtors. We scrimp, and we save. But let this be an earthly view of how we are. Because though we suffer, God is faithful, and we have hope. We are happy.
We are rich. And let no man be deceived by our appearance.
May the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you all.
There were cockroaches in the oven. One of them had an egg-sack on its end. This is terrible! All my life I've had to live in a cock roach infested house, until now. This was the one place where I could sleep at night without having to cover my ears with blanket for fear of roaches crawling in my ears and mouth. My mum's husband, who she's now in the process of divorcing, spent months laying on the couch, jobless. And his sister's van was infested with them, and since he is such a slob, he brought them in, and now we're infested with them.
I've had just about enough of that... Like... I used to live in a two story house, which is now demolished, where the cock-roaches were finger sized, and exploded in pus, water, and yellow stuff when you killed them. And the last house had cock roaches, plus termites, ants, and palm-sized spiders that could run as fast as I could. They've invaded the oven. So my sister and I took out the non-perishable food and sprayed behind there to make a barrier. But it's so gross to have them here. I can't leave my family in such a state, I have to try and do something. So I'm going to turn to God, and pray, and ask for solutions to this problem. Or if He could do something to help with this... Because nothing is impossible with God.
The same kingdom of heaven where Christ prepared a place for us: no pests are there, no dust, no rust, no fungi to decompose anything. Every thing there is living, and nothing breaks. I long for, in my heart, the peace of what God gave as an inheritance.
Well, at least this has been one of our smaller problems!
I just came back from church with my mum. My sister, Marley, stayed home. I wish I had a better church to go to. I'm going to pray for it. Because there's something wrong with that church. And I shouldn't have to go to a place where I'm always singled-out and eyed secretly by the pastor or have to feel like I have to defend myself there... It feels sad and lonely there, and I just shouldn't have to be made to feel that way. I'll try to find a better church. My mum wanted to stay for cookies and refreshments, so she went to catch a ride home with a friend. I just couldn't stay... And who knows how our Christmas will be. :-/ She wants us to come for Christmas Eve, but I don't want to spend my Christmas Eve there. That would be horrible. No one should have to feel this way in God's house... that's terrible.
I threw up a few hours ago. Big time. My mum says its stress. But I don't think it's stress. Today I left the house and I knew it should have eaten something, but all I ate was some chocolate thing. I was more worried about the exams. And God was helping me. I spent the entire night absorbing material like a robot. Like, when God touches you, boom, you absorb it like a sponge. All night. And so that morning I slept until 10, going to bed at 3. And I was either studying or testing all day. Took 2. Chemistry for Today and College Algebra. And when I was done with the Algebra, I walked out and my vision was blurry and I felt dizzy. And I think I was stumbling around. And I had to drive home in rush hour. So I went to a snack machine to get something. I bought pop tarts, and then some cookies. It was the cookies. They were stale or something. Because all the way home all I could feel was pain inside. You don't want to know what happened for the next few hours. I felt absolutely fine all day until I finished the exam. Like, I prayed so much that the Lord would help me with it. So then when I wasn't filled with the Spirit any longer, I was on my own strength, and I started to break down. Because it didn't start until the moment I handed in the test. This why I praise God... Because all of this could have been a problem, like, all day. But God made me strong so that it wouldn't matter. I'm drinking tea. It helps.
I should go to bed early tonight. I suppose I'll be fine. ~_~.
